SAD TODAY
Written by: Jenny Calvert
Today, I am sad. I am writing this devotional off the cuff, trusting God to give me the words. A couple weeks ago, a friend passed away, last week another. This week my mother is heading down that same path. I am traveling to Missouri to perhaps see her for the last time here on earth. My daughter is struggling working 4 part time jobs and still cannot make ends meet. Our "adopted" son is having difficulties with his Lupus. Things are not great today, so I am sad.
I have poured out my heart to God through tears and a deep moaning of the spirit. My desire is not for comfort or for health but my prayer is to no longer be Jenny at all. To be totally Him. So filled with His Holy Spirit, that all I do, say and think will be His thoughts, His actions, His words. I want to see others in a different way, through sympathetic, forgiving, loving eyes. I want my pride gone, to not think of how it affects me, but rather, how it affects others. I am so tired of myself.
God does not condemn me. In John 8:11, He told the adulteress woman, "I don't condemn you. Go and sin no more." What a relief for her as she was getting ready to be stoned to death.
So there is my desire, I want to be stoned to death of myself. I want to go and sin no more, but impossible for Jenny. So Dear Lord, stone Jenny today. I deserve every hit, every pain, even death. Then when I am rid of Jenny, I can be Jesus. Whole, clean, ready for service of others. He asks me, "Can you drink of this cup?" The answer, "Yes!" With Christ, all things are possible.
So today I am sad, and that is fine. God knows sorrow like no one else. If in my sorrow, I am a better servant, then so be it.
Written by: Jenny Calvert
I waited patiently for the Lord, and He turned to me, and
heard my cry. He also brought me up out
of a horrible pit, out of the miry clay, and set my feet on a rock, and
established my steps. He has put a new song in my mouth, even praise to our
God; many will see it, and fear, and will trust in the Lord. Blessed is the man
who places trust in the Lord. Psalms 40:
1-4 (MEV)
Today, I am sad. I am writing this devotional off the cuff, trusting God to give me the words. A couple weeks ago, a friend passed away, last week another. This week my mother is heading down that same path. I am traveling to Missouri to perhaps see her for the last time here on earth. My daughter is struggling working 4 part time jobs and still cannot make ends meet. Our "adopted" son is having difficulties with his Lupus. Things are not great today, so I am sad.
I have poured out my heart to God through tears and a deep moaning of the spirit. My desire is not for comfort or for health but my prayer is to no longer be Jenny at all. To be totally Him. So filled with His Holy Spirit, that all I do, say and think will be His thoughts, His actions, His words. I want to see others in a different way, through sympathetic, forgiving, loving eyes. I want my pride gone, to not think of how it affects me, but rather, how it affects others. I am so tired of myself.
God does not condemn me. In John 8:11, He told the adulteress woman, "I don't condemn you. Go and sin no more." What a relief for her as she was getting ready to be stoned to death.
So there is my desire, I want to be stoned to death of myself. I want to go and sin no more, but impossible for Jenny. So Dear Lord, stone Jenny today. I deserve every hit, every pain, even death. Then when I am rid of Jenny, I can be Jesus. Whole, clean, ready for service of others. He asks me, "Can you drink of this cup?" The answer, "Yes!" With Christ, all things are possible.
So today I am sad, and that is fine. God knows sorrow like no one else. If in my sorrow, I am a better servant, then so be it.
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